Time's perspective not always a comfort

It has been 10 months since one man brought my journalism career to a premature end, at least for now. And while I wrote recently about how this man and others in the company were without honor, I think there may actually be more to it.

I think for the last couple of years of my 29 years in the business, I might have been working for a man who was losing his mind.

I really don't know any other way to put it. So many of the things this man did were only borderline rational, and although I always wrote off his aggressiveness and his mood swings to "short man's syndrome," there might have been more to it.

I still remember the way he ranted at me again and again about how he was my boss when he called me in essentially to fire me, even though he extended it over a weekend. And he was completely infuriated when I refused to beg for my job during the second interview when he finished the task.

And when my last four words to him were "Steve, I forgive you," I honestly thought he wanted to hit me.

But the capper on it all came four weeks later. He had confiscated a piece of my personal property -- a Rolodex filled with phone numbers -- and I had asked that he return the Rolodex, even if he wanted to keep all the phone numbers.

My Rolodex came to me via UPS in an unmarked box -- broken into 15 or 16 pieces.

When it happened, I laughed at the thought that a vice president of a major media corporation had been so angered by the fact that I told him I forgave him that he felt the need to completely destroy my property.

But it's actually fairly creepy to realize someone hates you that much, and I'll admit I've had nightmares about it that have recurred time and again this year. I'm sure he would be happy to know that.

But I still forgive him. I've had a very relaxing year, and I've spent a lot more time with my lovely wife than I could when I was commuting 86 miles a day. My blood pressure is back to normal for the first time in a few years, which is also good. I'm pretty sure that's a direct result of not working for him anymore.

I do still have friends there, though, and I worry for them. I'm sure he isn't getting any better, and as the economy has turned down, he probably is feeling a lot more pressure.

I hope he can get some help.

I may be going back to work soon. I don't need to work, but I hate to see all my years in the newspaper business end on that note. If I do accept a job, though, I'm going to make sure of two things.

The people I work for need to be honorable -- and sane.